Maxims of The Peaceful Teacher

 

The mission of World Laughter Tour has always been, "Together we can lead the world to health, happiness, and peace through laughter.” Every edition of the “Study Guide and Reference Manual”*, which has grown from 30 pages to 145, includes this advice to our students:

“Find your source, live from it, keep your heart open, and laugh generously.
These are maxims of the peaceful teacher, the tools of a gentle healer.”

~Alan Cohen

Not only are humor and laughter therapeutic allies of our physical and mental health, they are characteristics that reflect the spiritual health of humankind and this planet; what we call peace.

Thanks to the help, support, and encouragement of many friends, scientists, clowns, clinicians, and other laughter lovers, we have done a good job of understanding and promoting the health and happiness ideals of our mission, evolving to be referred to as tools for health and well-being.

Now, let’s focus more sharply on the peace ideals of the mission.

To open a conversation on the topic, I commend to you “Cultivating Peace: Becoming a 21st-Century Peace Ambassador," by James O’Dea (Shift Books, May 10, 2012). Deepak Chopra calls this holistic approach to peace work “a brilliant manifesto that weaves science, spirituality, and social healing into a peace roadmap for us all.”

Jill Knox, RN, turned me on to the book. She is a peace activist, an advocate for healthy humor, and the current president of the Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor. Her vision and passion for these things will be a lasting legacy to our field. I will do what I can to help.

You would probably never expect O’Dea, who spent ten years as the Director of the Washington Office of Amnesty International, to lead off in Chapter One making a cogent and compelling case  about the importance of laughter in laying the foundation for us to work for peace. “Cultivating Peace,” he says, “begins with not taking ourselves so seriously.” He reminds us that, “a world without laughter would not be a safe or peaceful world.”

Anger and violence, he says, constantly cook up a “biochemical brew…that is toxic at every level--physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually. They shut down the body’s exquisite ease, delight, and pleasure signals and replace them with hypervigilance and stress alerts.”

From that premise, he examines, explains, coaxes, cajoles, and carefully convinces us that the art and heart of peace advocacy and activism is within us our grasp. It will take some work to make it manifest but he shows the way. He calmly convinces us that we can find greater peace within ourselves, tantalizing us with the prospect of profound personal satisfactions as well as the realization of the better world we seek and often speak of. He repeatedly and realistically cautions us that the road to peace will not be smooth nor easy nor quick, but the promised  destination is possible eventually and definitely worth the trip.

A few quotes from Cultivating Peace, Chapter One:

The peace journey begins with understanding positive emotions, seeing how “truth, reconciliation, and forgiveness are essential components of collective healing strategies…”

“In time, I came to learn that too much seriousness is deadly.”

“Any kind of overbearing behavior--be it self-righteousness, bigotry, aggression, condemnation, arrogance, or finger-pointing--is an interruption of the body’s circuitry of love joy and play.”

“When we cultivate love and joyful service, we live longer, healthier, happier lives.”

“…jokes can have a way of revealing sadness, emptiness, hostility, and even viciousness. But true humor does not carry a poison pill.”

“Laughing is about the bubbling up of connection.”

Get hold of a copy of Cultivating Peace and start reading. Then, please join me in reflecting and connecting how humor and laughter are not only therapeutic allies in the sense of your physical health, but also in the healing of humankind and this planet.

If you have a favorite quote about peace, please share it with me here or on Facebook.

Click These Links to Listen to John Lennon and Leadbelly

Imagine

Give Peace a Chance
Ain't Gonna Study War No More

* CLICK HERE to purchase the Study Guide and Reference Manual.

PLEASE SHARE THIS WITH EVERYONE WHO MIGHT LIKE TO HAVE IT.

THE FUN-MINUTE MANAGER

This Ziggy cartoon illustrates the anti-pleasure, anti-joy, anti-happiness attitude that our society frequently imposes on us in the workplace. Ideas such as “work before play" and the notion that we don't deserve pleasure until all of our work is done, cause many people enormous undeserved guilt and anxiety simply because they took some time to be playful. According to formidable evidence about the relationship between happiness and success, these anhedonic attitudes are likely to be counter-productive.

Anhedonia is the pervasive and damaging mental and emotional condition in which the ability to experience maximum pleasure in life is restricted or curtailed. It wouldn't surprise me if most people in our culture suffer from some degree of anhedonia. Until they correct it they cannot fully enjoy life. They experience guilt, fear, anger, depression, boredom, tension, fatigue, illness and, variations on those painful emotional themes.

We cannot effectively solve life's problems, large or small, if we don't take time off to refresh ourselves and recharge our batteries.

I have long understood that it is not psychologically economical to constantly dwell on a problem. It is advantageous to allow yourself to balance fretful worry with time off.

Shawn Achor, the CEO of Good Think and the author of The Happiness Advantage (Crown Business, 2010), has lots of evidence that happiness is important to the company’s bottom-line. “It's clear that increasing your happiness improves your chances of success,” he says. “Developing new habits, nurturing your coworkers, and thinking positively about stress are good ways to start. For companies, happy employees mean better bottom-line results. Employees who score low in ‘life satisfaction,’ stay home an average of 1.25 more days a month, a 2008 study by Gallup Healthways shows. That translates into a decrease in productivity of 15 days a year.

He cites another study that found that employees who score high in ‘life satisfaction’ are significantly more likely to receive high ratings from customers. Retail stores that scored higher on employee life satisfaction generated $21 more in earnings per square foot of space than the other stores, adding $32 million in additional profits for the whole chain.”

Achor suggests making a list of the stresses you’re under. “Place them into two groups—the ones you can control (like a project or your in-box) and those you can’t (the stock market, housing prices). Choose one stress that you can control and come up with a small, concrete step you can take to reduce it. In this way you can nudge your brain back to a positive—and productive—mind-set.”

I would add my strong suggestion that the small, concrete step may well involve a short respite from your problems, including time spent in activities that are pleasurable: a nap, a massage, an ice-cream cone, a manicure, a walk, a funny movie, a comedy club. Putting your worries in a compartment where you won’t be distracted by them for a couple for hours or days, may be the best way to let your brain incubate on solutions and come up with the best ones.

Being totally immersed , involved, and absorbed with our problems narrows our perspective so we can't see all sides of the situation and we don't do our best thinking about coping and finding solutions. Wallowing in worry is wasteful; we become overwhelmed and our mental faculties overload to the point of shutdown or, worse, making bad decisions.

Claiming permission for our own guilt-free laughter, pleasure, and play infuses more energizing and productive attitudes and emotions into all aspects of life, at home, at work, or wherever, is the process by which we can overcome our anhedonic tendencies.

One of the psychological dynamics of humor is that it shows us other ways of looking at things. The humorous perspective, often referred to as psychological distance, gives us temporary relief from the stress of worry and the opportunity to see more resources and  better ways of dealing with situations.

When Dr. Kenneth Blanchard, co-author of "The One Minute Manager", renowned speaker and management consultant was interviewed by Joel Goodman, founder of The Humor Project and editor of Laughing Matters, he offered thoughts about people, productivity, and the world of work that had a touch of the humorous perspective:

"The ultimate in self-actualization,” Blanchard said, “is when a person is confused about the difference between employment and recreation."

"A university is defined as thousands of people gathered around a common parking problem."

"One day a little girl asked her mother, "Mommy, why does Daddy br1ng so much work home at night?" "Because he doesn’t have time to finish it at work," answered the mother. "Then why don't they put him in a slower group?" asked the little girl.

"The value of being able to laugh at ourselves when we make a mistake: it helps us get on with our work."
In and of themselves, humor, laughter, and play may not be solutions, but properly applied they can lead to good solutions and turn run-of-the-mill into fun-of-the-mill. Try them soon!

Learn more about the topic at:
 World Laughter Tour, Inc.
 The Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor
 The International Society for Humor Studies

Women at Work: Funny AND Successful

Humor-wise, author, humorist, and feminist, Dr. Gina Barreca, sees the world changing for women at work. "Humor from women," she says, "is not only increasingly acceptable both individually and in a professional setting: it’s expected. It’s regarded as part of leadership skill-set. Humor is an indication of quick-thinking, careful listening, an ability to take controlled risks and the desire to play well with others."

Here's my advice for women about being funny at work: use humor strategically. See details below. There is evidence that a woman’s good sense of humor can benefit her career. When 200 executives were asked to name the qualities that kept women from succeeding, lack of a sense of humor was near the top of the list.

Using humor improves a woman’s chances of attracting power and credibility, but women should be aware of a double standard when attempting to inject some humor into a situation. A woman telling a joke is not likely be viewed with the same acceptance as a man telling the same joke. So says psychologist Steve Wilson, an internationally recognized authority on applied and therapeutic humor.

 

Viva la Difference?

Understanding the gender issues associated with humor helps women benefit from the strategic use of humor, which has traditionally been available primarily to men in the workplace.

 

·         Men and women have somewhat different senses of humor; women's humor tends to be kinder than men's.

·         Men will joke about almost anything (gratuitous humor); women's humor tends to be empathetic, situational, or funny stories about the family or everyday life; creating harmony where there has been tension.

·         Men tend to be comfortable telling jokes to anyone who will listen; typically, women are more comfortable telling jokes to small groups of people they know well.

·         Women have greater social permission than men to laugh at even the smallest amount of humor. Men often feel a “masculine imperative” to make others laugh while also daring others to “make me laugh!”

·         In our culture, it is generally expected that the man will initiate the humor and the woman will be passive and receptive; and, men and women have different comfort levels about taking center stage or having power.

·         Men are more expected to be able to take "practical" jokes and dish them out.

 

Management consultant, Dr. Barbara Mackoff says that women in business need to show a good sense of humor. “In reality,” she says, "a woman can be funny and still maintain her credibility."

 

Funny, credible, and VERY successful

Writing for FORBES about humor as a key to success at work, Jacquelyn Smith says, “Whatever the reason might be, if you or your colleagues tend to be dry and dull in the office, you’ll want to work on injecting more humor into your workday.”  Smith quotes Lynn Taylor, workplace expert, “You don’t have to be a stand-up comedian, but well-placed humor that is clever and apropos to a business situation always enhances an employee's career.”

Showing one’s good sense of humor has advantages in hiring, promotion, and leadership opportunities. Long the hallmark of a pleasant personality, employees with a sense of humor are viewed as having highly desirable traits required of today’s leaders, executives, managers and supervisors: flexible, creative, and adaptable to change.

When you use humor you do not stop being serious about your responsibilities, values, goals, and beliefs; you show that you can take yourself lightly. Studies show that executives believe that employees with a sense of humor do a better job; and, CEOs prefer job candidates with a sense of humor. The two most desirable traits in leaders were found to be a strong work ethic and a good sense of humor.  Donna Couper, a business consultant, says, "Even in a job interview, assuming you're qualified for the position, showing that you have a sense of humor will make your prospective employer feel more comfortable with you."

Effective work teams develop a special form of group humor called "the inside joke", a humor-in-common language that plays a bonding role, strengthening loyalty, and making the work environment more pleasant and, yes, more productive, too.

 

 

Much joking fits in with a competitive style that is more comfortable for men. Certainly, women do tell jokes, and many can do it well.  However, according to Professor Deborah Tannen, "Since [women] are not driven to seek and hold center stage in a group, they do not need a store of jokes to whip out for this purpose." She also reported, "There are fewer such (story-telling) personalities among women than among men. Many women who do tell jokes to large groups of people come from ethnic backgrounds in which verbal performance is highly valued.  Many women are less likely than men to tell jokes in large groups, especially groups including men."

Jenna Goudreau, FORBES staff writer about business and women’s leadership, calls the idea that humor is dangerous in the office is “old-school HR.” Rapidly going out of vogue are Victorian ideas about laughter and humor such as: women should always be able to take a joke but not get a certain innuendo; women should laugh along with the laugh track; smile perpetually; and, women should not laugh with their mouths open.

 

Advice For Women Using Humor At Work

1. Don't merely imitate men's humor. Women's humor has the advantage of tending to be more personal and situational, with the effect of being harmonizing.

2. You do not need to tell jokes: a warm smile, a true story, the “Erma Bombeck” view of things, or a well-timed ad lib can bring even more benefits than jokes. Beverly Sills said, "I can't be happy every day, but at least I can be cheerful."

3. Use only humor that fits you, that fits the occasion and the audience, and when the time is right (not “too soon”).

4. Promote the use of humor in company newsletters and on bulletin boards.

5. Encourage "humor breaks" or times when everyone can lighten up for a few minutes.

6. If the joke has to be "on" someone, make it yourself, but NEVER belittle yourself with a joke.

7. Don't poke fun at abilities, race, religion, gender or anything that other people couldn't change in the next five minutes.

8. If you do decide to tell jokes, practice privately until you can tell them well.

CAUTIONS: Be wary of humor overkill. The “class clown” may be a distraction and barrier to teamwork. When it comes to humor, everyone must be sensitive and sensible. There is no place in the work place for humor that is sarcastic, ridiculing, uses taboo language, or is sexual, sexist, racist, age-ist, or otherwise puts people down. Use humor that lifts people up, and draws them together.

Goudreau cites psychologist Steven Sultanoff, PhD, an expert on applied humor, saying, “used effectively, humor helps people get along, decreases turnover and increases productivity. And that’s no joke.”