Personal Bill of Rights

Whether you are somewhere in the arc of recovery (because growing up, somewhere along the line, many of us received too much, too little, or the wrong kind of something, and we need to get that straightened out in order to be happily fully functional), or you feel that your life is pretty stable and happy, or you want to be even happier (flourish is the word Martin Seligman uses), the Personal Bill of Rights might be helpful.

From time to time, the topics here are not directly about humor or laughter because there is a "meta" purpose, a larger theme: illuminating the human condition. These are my attempts to think-write-discuss ideas that will help us to know who we are and understand how we can get through this existence in the best possible way. These ideas reflect on aspects of be-ing, with the aim of making our be-ing healthier and happier.

Who are we, the people?



For your consideration, here is something from my files that I have always felt was worthwhile. It's been in my files for 25 years, gathering dust. Now, out in the fresh air, in the light of day, it can have new life by sharing. 

 

Whether you agree or disagree, accept or re-write, or draw your own conclusions, I believe you can find some sense of support, encouragement, strength, and confidence in these personal policies and practices that will contribute to your happiness.

 

PERSONAL

Adapted from “Healing The Child Within” (1987) by Charles L. Whitfield, M.D.

1. I have numerous choices in my life beyond mere survival.
2. I have a right to discover and know my Child Within.
3. I have a right to grieve over what I didn't get that I needed or what I got that I didn't need or want.
4. I have a right to follow my own values and standards.
5. I have a right to recognize and accept my own value system as appropriate.
6. I have a right to say no to anything when I feel I am not ready, it is unsafe or violates my values.
7. I have a right to dignity and respect.
8. I have a right to make decisions .
9. I have a right to determine and honor my own priorities.
10.  I have the right to have my needs and wants respected by others.
11.  I have the right to terminate conversations with people with whom I feel put down and humiliated.
12.  I have the right not to be responsible for others' behavior, actions, feelings or problems.
13.  I have a right to make mistakes and not have to be perfect.
14.  I have a right to expect honesty from others.
15.  I have a right to all of my feelings.
16.  I have a right to be angry at someone I love.
17.  I have a right to be uniquely me, without feeling I'm not good enough.
18.  I have a right to feel scared and to say "I'm afraid".
19.  I have the right to experience and then let go of fear, guilt and shame.
20.  I have a right to make decisions based on my feelings, my judgment or any reason that I chose.
21.  I have a right to change my mind at any time.
22.  I have the right to be happy.
23.  I have a right to stability - i.e. "roots" and stable healthy relationships of my choice.
24.  I have the right to my own personal space and time needs.
25.  There is no need to smile when I cry.
26.  It is OK to be relaxed, playful and frivolous.
27.  I have the right to be flexible and be comfortable with doing so.
28.  I have the right to change and grow.
29.  I have the right to be open to improve communication skills so that I may be understood.
30.  I have a right to make friends and be comfortable around people.
31.  I have a right to be in a non-abusive environment.
32.  I can be healthier than those around me.
33.  I can take care of myself, no matter what.
34.  I have the right to grieve over actual or threatened losses.
35.  I have the right to trust others who earn my trust.
36.  I have the right to forgive others and to forgive myself.
37.  I have the right to give and to receive unconditional love.

“Healing The Child Within” (1987) by Charles L. Whitfield, M.D., is available at many online booksellers. From an online description:

 

Have you ever heard of your inner child? Well, this is the classic book that started it all.

In 1987, Charlie Whitfield's breakthrough concept of the child within—that part of us which is truly alive, energetic, creative and fulfilled—launched the inner child movement. Healing the Child Within describes how the inner child is lost to trauma and loss, and how by recovering it, we can heal the fear, confusion and unhappiness of adult life.

[More than] eighteen years and more than a million copies sold later, Healing the Child Within is a perennial selling classic in the field of psychology. And it is even more timely today than it was in 1987. Recent brain research, particularly on the effects of trauma on the brain of developing children, has supported Whitfield's intuitive understanding as a psychiatrist.

 

Please share this blog with anyone you know who might want to see it.

Prayer for The Birthday of the World: Happy 5774 Years

During the time in my life when my flower-child hippie side was more conspicuous, there was lots of interest in vibrational energy. There was fascination with Far Eastern spiritual practices like Trancendental Meditation, and chemically-induced 'insights' to the interconnectedness of all and everything. We spoke of auras, mantras and chakras, and the importance of being here now. We referred to picking up on the vibrational energy of people and situations as “vibes”. The vibes could be good or bad, foreboding or comforting: Hey, man, I like the vibes in this coffee house.

There is now compelling contemporary evidence that vibrational energy is  real, detectable and influential. According to the Institute of Heartmath, “Every cell in your body is bathed in an environment of magnetic forces which are invisible to the human eye. Numerous rhythms within your body can synchronize with solar and geomagnetic activity.”

 

 
Tradition, Not Literalism
According to Jewish tradition, on the evening when Rosh Hashana begins the world has a birthday. By this measure, this year on September 4 on the secular calendar the world became 5774 years old.

In the Jewish religion, the ten days starting with Rosh Hashanah and ending with Yom Kippur are commonly known as the Days of Awe or the Days of Repentance. This important period, which always occurs in the autumn, is devoted to serious introspection, a time to consider the sins of the previous year and repent before Yom Kippur. Among the customs of this time it is common to seek reconciliation with people you may have wronged during the course of the year. These are days that call for sincere personal reflection and affirming better intentions for the coming year. This holiday is both solemn and joyous since it is both the Day of Repentance or Day of Judgement and the birthday of the world.

What does that have to do with laughter therapy?
One of the basic principles of laughter therapy is that the method and programs are non-religious; participation is not restricted by religious belief. An important part of our therapeutic strategy is to be open to welcome everybody. Proselytizing is not permitted. Group prayer, in the traditional form of spiritual communion with a deity, is not part of the program.

Recent scientific evidence points to important distinctions in human well-being depending on whether your happiness is hedonic-based (feel-good pleasure), or eudaimonic-based (virtue or altruism). This research strongly suggests that our well-being depends more on meaning than happiness. Another study, using fMRI technology, revealed that brain activation patterns are specific to particular induced (genuine) emotions. Extrapolating from these findings, I infer that inclusion of activities such as Good-Hearted Living(tm) along with activities that induce true mirthful laughter makes for a program (laughter therapy) that is more likely to lead to well-being than one that has people doing only laughter exercises, or worse, faking laughing.

As we continue to illuminate the human condition, especially our understanding of the better nature of humankind, we have expanded laughter therapy from a simple set of so-called laughter exercises to activities that go beyond the act of mirthful laughter. We incorporate the promotion and cultivation of the attitudes, emotions, and conditions that incline people to laughter; affirmation, meditation, ‘holding a good thought or positive intention’, and contributing to community and society are encouraged.

Speaking most broadly, prayer does not have to involve a deity. When seeking solutions to human problems, one can concentrate on thanksgiving, earnest requests, petitions, or entreaties to oneself, one’s neighbors, government, or to the energy of cosmos.

“Days of Awe” - What’s that? And, what does that have to do with laughter therapy?

Awe is one of the most wonderfully healthy emotions. I would put it as one of the top 5 significant emotions a human being can experience (gratitude and hope are two of the others).

In contemporary vernacular slang, awesome is a simple shorthand way to refer to something that is very impressive: That new white convertible is totally awesome.

More traditionally (and therapeutically) it is an overwhelming feeling of reverence, admiration, fear, etc., produced by that which is grand, sublime, extremely powerful, or the like. Something that is ‘awesome’ has the power to inspire fear or reverence. Combining the two usages, it refers to something that is so wonderful and impressive, often something in nature, that it blows your mind: That sunset was awesome!

 

Laughter therapy is an eclectic method that has roots in Norman Cousins’ now well-verified belief that in addition to humor and laughter, all of the positive emotions are beneficial for human beings. “Careful readers of my book [Anatomy of an Illness], however, knew that laughter was just a metaphor for the entire range of the positive emotions. Hope, faith, love, will to live, cheerfulness, humor, creativity, playfulness, confidence, great expectations--all these, I believed had therapeutic value" (p. 50).

Norman Cousins

All of that said, here for your consideration is the Days-of-Awe prayer written by Rabbi Howard L. Apothaker, Temple Beth Shalom, New Albany, Ohio, for inclusion in their Yom Kippur 5774 religious services.

As you read these virtuous ideals, you may want to focus on them verbatim (as written) or consider trying this prayer as a series of affirmations, meditations, mantras, or visualizations of intention for a better world. You may want to substitute “We pray” with words that are more comfortable or meaningful to you, such as “I contribute to…” or “I focus on…” or "I visualize...". Experiment to find the words that suit you best.

An Acrostic "Days of Awe" Prayer
Written by Rabbi Howard L. Apothaker

During these Days of Awe, we pray for open minds and open hearts, encompassing the A-to-Z, from Awe to Zeal, for returning to our most humane conduct.

We pray for an end to animosity, and a return to affability.
We pray for an end to bigotry, and a return to blessing.
We pray for an end to cruelty, and a return to caring.
We pray for an end to deception, and a return to devotion.
We pray for an end to enmity, and a return to engagement.
We pray for an end to faultfinding, and a return to forgiveness.
We pray for an end to greed, and a return to generosity.
We pray for an end to hostility, and a return to heartfulness.
We pray for an end to injustice, and a return to integrity.
We pray for an end to jingoism, and a return to judiciousness.
We pray for an end to Klannishness, and a return to kindness.
We pray for an end to lewdness, and a return to love.
We pray for an end to maliciousness, and a return to mercy.
We pray for an end to nastiness, and a return to niceness.
We pray for an end to obstinacy, and a return to open-mindedness.
We pray for an end to prejudice, and a return to peacefulness.
We pray for an end of querulousness, and a return to quietude.
We pray for an end to ridicule, and a return to respect.
We pray for an end to selfishness, and a return to sacrifice.
We pray for an end to trash-talk, and a return to tact.
We pray for an end to violence, and a return to values.
We pray for an end to warfare, and a return to welcoming.
We pray for an end to xenophobia, and a return to examination of self.
We pray for an end to yelling insults, and to a return to yielding ground.
We pray for an end to zero-sum, and a return to zeal for cooperation.

May this "alphabet of prayers" reflect the breadth of our concern for our people, for all peoples, for every person; at this time, through all time, in our time; and for all humane convictions and creeds.

AMEN.

 

The thoughts you hold become your actions and your character and your destiny.These are some pretty good thoughts to hold onto. Concentrate on them and let them guide your actions. They resonate with virtuous ideals. The more you think and act on these, the more likely you are to enhance your well-being. And, with each step closer to these conditions, the more likely you are to experience good vibes, man, well-being, and true mirthful laughter.

Make Your Life More Playful

 

Man is most nearly himself when he achieves the seriousness of a child at play.
-Heraclitus

Misce stultitiam consiliis brevem; dulce est desipere in loco.
(Mix a little foolishness with your prudence: it's good to be silly at the right moment.) -Horace

 

Don't ever let your mind keep you from having a good time. -Jason Mraz

A sense of playfulness is the best defense against taking yourself too seriously.
-Peter Kai Chang

I think entrepreneurship is our natural state -a big adult word that boils down to something much more obvious like playfulness. -Richard Branson

 

Playfulness is more important than play. According to SteveGross, Executive Director – and Chief Playmaker – of The Life is good Playmakers, “We all know that it is critical for kids of all ages to play. And we know that play can take many forms. But there’s a deeper idea about the importance for kids to learn how to be playful – and how that spirit should permeate their development.”

The same goes for adults.

One of the surest techniques for being playful is to not keep score. As soon as you start keeping score or comparing one person’s performance to another, playfulness goes away and self-esteem is at stake. Stress and striving start, and unhappiness looms with the prospect of falling short, losing, or failing.

In 10 Ways to MakeYour Life More Playful, Melissa Kirk, says, “When we lose ourselves in play, whether creating a make-believe world, throwing a ball between friends, frolicking with our dog, or watching silly YouTube videos, we allow ourselves to get out of the linear, problem-solution, adult mindset. We’re activating a part of our brains that we don’t use much in the grown-up world: the one that doesn’t care about deadlines or mortgages or how much we weigh, the one that doesn’t care how we look to others.”

Bernie Dekoven, author of The Well Played Game, observes,  "Even though I rigorously claim that ‘the playful path is the shortest road to happiness,’ it often happens that we don’t choose to be playful. We could, but we don’t. Maybe we’re not happy enough. Maybe some perverse part of ourselves is having more fun being miserable. But even the best of us, even the most professionally playful of us, forget to be playful. And even though we have the choice and we know we have the choice, we simply can’t get ourselves to play. We can’t act playfully, or feel playful or be playful.

"Sure, we can play the same kinds of games we played when we were children, but experiencing those same games, as adults, weaving them into the context of what we have since learned and experienced and dreamed, the games become something else, we become something more. We care for each other differently. We appreciate each other differently. We play with each other differently.

"For many reasons, it can take us years, decades before we can allow ourselves embrace fun and silliness the way we once did when we were children. And when we finally make it back, we discover that we are different, and it is different; and yet it welcomes us, embraces us as powerfully, as naturally, as meaningfully as it did when we last understood its place in our lives – more meaningfully, because we are adults, and we must, not because, but in spite of it all, choose to have fun, to be silly."

Techniques to Facilitate Play Behavior

1.    List three times or periods in your life during each week when you are free from responsibility.

2.    Go back to your own childhood and think about the kind of play you enjoyed at that time.

3.    Pay attention to your dreams and daydreams about play. For one month keep a journal record of your dreams. Pay attention to the ones that are particularly free, spontaneous, and joyful.

4.    Plan to spend at least two hours each week watching children play. Do this for one month. Do you find yourself smiling inside as you watch them? What kinds of activities are they experiencing?

 

5.    Plan to play with children during the week. If you have your own children, make a special effort to play with them ''just for the fun of it.” Did you laugh out loud during your play with them?

6.    List three friends who are most playful and fun to be with. Think about how you could plan to spend more time with these people.  

7.    Think about the kind of environment or setting that you need for play. Do you need to be outside your home? Do you need to be wearing special "play" clothes? Is there a special room in your home where you feel most free and spontaneous?

8.    Lock the bathroom door and look at yourself in the mirror. Try to think serious and then humorous thoughts. Smile at yourself in the mirror for two minutes.

9.    Practice laughing with a friend. If necessary, have that friend tickle you. Tell each other jokes. go to a silly movie, Make a tape of yourself laughing and plan to play it back in privacy when you are feeling most depressed.

THE FUN-MINUTE MANAGER

This Ziggy cartoon illustrates the anti-pleasure, anti-joy, anti-happiness attitude that our society frequently imposes on us in the workplace. Ideas such as “work before play" and the notion that we don't deserve pleasure until all of our work is done, cause many people enormous undeserved guilt and anxiety simply because they took some time to be playful. According to formidable evidence about the relationship between happiness and success, these anhedonic attitudes are likely to be counter-productive.

Anhedonia is the pervasive and damaging mental and emotional condition in which the ability to experience maximum pleasure in life is restricted or curtailed. It wouldn't surprise me if most people in our culture suffer from some degree of anhedonia. Until they correct it they cannot fully enjoy life. They experience guilt, fear, anger, depression, boredom, tension, fatigue, illness and, variations on those painful emotional themes.

We cannot effectively solve life's problems, large or small, if we don't take time off to refresh ourselves and recharge our batteries.

I have long understood that it is not psychologically economical to constantly dwell on a problem. It is advantageous to allow yourself to balance fretful worry with time off.

Shawn Achor, the CEO of Good Think and the author of The Happiness Advantage (Crown Business, 2010), has lots of evidence that happiness is important to the company’s bottom-line. “It's clear that increasing your happiness improves your chances of success,” he says. “Developing new habits, nurturing your coworkers, and thinking positively about stress are good ways to start. For companies, happy employees mean better bottom-line results. Employees who score low in ‘life satisfaction,’ stay home an average of 1.25 more days a month, a 2008 study by Gallup Healthways shows. That translates into a decrease in productivity of 15 days a year.

He cites another study that found that employees who score high in ‘life satisfaction’ are significantly more likely to receive high ratings from customers. Retail stores that scored higher on employee life satisfaction generated $21 more in earnings per square foot of space than the other stores, adding $32 million in additional profits for the whole chain.”

Achor suggests making a list of the stresses you’re under. “Place them into two groups—the ones you can control (like a project or your in-box) and those you can’t (the stock market, housing prices). Choose one stress that you can control and come up with a small, concrete step you can take to reduce it. In this way you can nudge your brain back to a positive—and productive—mind-set.”

I would add my strong suggestion that the small, concrete step may well involve a short respite from your problems, including time spent in activities that are pleasurable: a nap, a massage, an ice-cream cone, a manicure, a walk, a funny movie, a comedy club. Putting your worries in a compartment where you won’t be distracted by them for a couple for hours or days, may be the best way to let your brain incubate on solutions and come up with the best ones.

Being totally immersed , involved, and absorbed with our problems narrows our perspective so we can't see all sides of the situation and we don't do our best thinking about coping and finding solutions. Wallowing in worry is wasteful; we become overwhelmed and our mental faculties overload to the point of shutdown or, worse, making bad decisions.

Claiming permission for our own guilt-free laughter, pleasure, and play infuses more energizing and productive attitudes and emotions into all aspects of life, at home, at work, or wherever, is the process by which we can overcome our anhedonic tendencies.

One of the psychological dynamics of humor is that it shows us other ways of looking at things. The humorous perspective, often referred to as psychological distance, gives us temporary relief from the stress of worry and the opportunity to see more resources and  better ways of dealing with situations.

When Dr. Kenneth Blanchard, co-author of "The One Minute Manager", renowned speaker and management consultant was interviewed by Joel Goodman, founder of The Humor Project and editor of Laughing Matters, he offered thoughts about people, productivity, and the world of work that had a touch of the humorous perspective:

"The ultimate in self-actualization,” Blanchard said, “is when a person is confused about the difference between employment and recreation."

"A university is defined as thousands of people gathered around a common parking problem."

"One day a little girl asked her mother, "Mommy, why does Daddy br1ng so much work home at night?" "Because he doesn’t have time to finish it at work," answered the mother. "Then why don't they put him in a slower group?" asked the little girl.

"The value of being able to laugh at ourselves when we make a mistake: it helps us get on with our work."
In and of themselves, humor, laughter, and play may not be solutions, but properly applied they can lead to good solutions and turn run-of-the-mill into fun-of-the-mill. Try them soon!

Learn more about the topic at:
 World Laughter Tour, Inc.
 The Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor
 The International Society for Humor Studies

We didn’t see it coming.

Pam and I have a standing joke that one of us is sleeping with the boss. On Boss’s Day recently, we argued about which one of us should send flowers.

We never intended it.

We didn’t plan it.

It was never a goal.

There is no precedent for it.

We didn’t see it coming.

Yet, now we find ourselves with a constituency of thousands of CLLs that is at least 85% female.*

It is high in our consciousness.

In many places, women are at a disadvantage, but in World Laughter Tour,  women not only lead a global movement for health, happiness, and peace, they also lead the businesses that fulfill the mission and generate incomes that help feed their families.

When we aim to help CLLs be competent and confident and successful in this funny business, it is largely about women.

Because we have launched our series of online classes for better business**, I thought you might also appreciate this video. Perhaps it will inspire you.

As always,

Steve

*I have a theory about why that has happened, but I am saving it for another time. What do you think?

**Our webinar class covering brilliant business basics is available now.

The Why, Which, Where, When & How of Affirmations for Peace of Mind, Health & Happiness

"Be careful of your thoughts, for your thoughts become your words.
 Be careful of your words, for your words become your actions.
 Be careful of your actions, for your actions become your habits.
 Be careful of your habits, for your habits become your character.
 Be careful of your character, for your character becomes your destiny."
 ~Author unknown

To “affirm” something, by dictionary definition, means that you are declaring it to be true.

By design and tradition, World Laughter Tour's laughter therapy sessions close with three affirmations. We shout them cheerfully and enthusiastically, as a call-and-response activity, with participants encouraged throw their arms up in a victory gesture with a chorus of the affirmative response, "YES!"

"We can be happier tomorrow than we are today!" (YES!)
"We can be healthier tomorrow than we are today!" (YES!)
"We love to laugh!" (YES!)

Participants leave the sessions uplifted. They have learned three affirmations that will stand them in good stead if they choose to use them properly.

Positive Psychology
In Delivering Happiness: Translating Positive Psychology Intervention Research for Treating Major and Minor Depressive Disorders, The Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine, V. 17, Number 8, 2011, Layous et al summarize recent studies of the promising initial findings that Positive Activity Interventions (PAIs), saying that PAIs, "contribute to low-cost effective interventions that can serve either as initial therapy for mild symptoms or as adjunctive therapy for partial responders to medication. PAIs teach individuals ways to increase their positive thinking, positive affect, and positive behaviors. Our method draws on positive psychology, social psychology, affective neuroscience, game theory, and ancient spiritual practices to create a model of how laughter and other PAIs might relieve mood disorders and other conditions, as well as strengthen what works well for individuals." (Italics added.)

In addition to the positive psychology basis for understanding the how & why of affirmations, Eve Hogan asks, "So when we affirm that we are fit when we may not be, wealthy when we are financially struggling, or loved when we are lonely, how exactly does that work if we are striving  to live authentically? Are we just  kidding ourselves?" Not at all.

"An affirmation is usually a sentence or phrase that you repeat regularly to make a formal declaration to yourself and the universe of your intention for it to be the truth. While some may say it is akin to 'fake it until you make it,' I see it a bit more like holding the vision of what I know can be true. Here is how they work."

WHAT? Consonance, Dissonance, and Affective Neurosciences
We all have in our brains a thing called a reticular activating system (RAS), composed of several neuronal circuits connecting the brainstem to the cortex. The RAS helps mediate transitions from sleep to wakefulness, and from relaxed wakefulness to periods of high attention. When we use affirmations we want to increase our attention to the positive thoughts of the affirmation, the positive emotions that accompany the vision of achieving our goals and fulfilling our needs, as well as opportunities to act accordingly.

The RAS is like a filter that lets in information that we need, and filters out information that we don’t. If we didn’t have this system, we would be bombarded with so much information that our senses would overload and we would go into massive overwhelm. Instead, through heightened attention when we are awake, our brain registers what matters to us based on our goals, needs, interests, and desires.

During a lecture I attended many years ago in Columbus, Ohio, when teaching about meditation, mindfulness and awareness, Ram Dass, an American contemporary spiritual teacher, gave this example. If you are driving into a strange town and your car engine is making a strange noise, you will tend to notice garages, mechanics, and auto repair places, but probably you will not notice the restaurants. On the other hand, if you are hungry as you drive into the town, you will tend to notice all the restaurants and none of auto repair shops. We tend to notice (be more aware of) that which is important to us. The RAS does that for us; it is helping us focus on what's important.

Most of us have had the experience of a friend showing us their new car and it’s a make and model we have never seen before. Then, now that it is important to us, we suddenly begin to see that particular make and model everywhere we look.

Your RAS recognizes what is important to you and allows the information in. When what is important to us is congruent with where we focus and how we act, we experience consonance.

Repeating an affirmation--holding the thought-- may also serve us by setting up a kind of cognitive dissonance. Eve Hogan uses the term dynamic tension to refer to our awareness of the difference between the state described in our positive affirmations and the reality of where we are. Hogan says, "If ideal weight is your emphasis, you will suddenly begin to see every gym and weight loss product. If money is your goal, investment and earning opportunities will move to the forefront of your awareness. In essence, the affirmation can kick your creativity into high gear." She suggests that we then will take actions to bring our actual state closer to the affirmed state, thus relieve the tension. "See if you can make the dynamic tension go away by making your words and reality match." I can see where this would work for some people.

TAPPING INTO HAPPINESS
Positive psychologist, Dr. Barbara Fredrickson, says that you tap into happiness "whenever positive emotions resonate within you.” When you say an affirmation over and over again, a couple of things happen. One is that it sends a very clear message to your RAS that this is important to you. That starts positive emotions resonating within you. Your brains gets busy noticing ways to help you achieve your goals.

WHERE? WHICH?
You can find many books of affirmations, and lists appear in magazines weekly and monthly. How do you know which ones to work with?

There is no sure way to know which ones will work for you. It's partly intuition, partly trial-and-error, and partly common sense. You may come across an affirmation that "speaks" to you, it just feels right. Write them down and keep them in a safe place for use immediately or at some later time. And, you can design your own affirmations.

Every bit as important as which affirmation you choose to work with is how you work with it.

Hogan, again: "So what makes an effective affirmation? First, determine what kind of transformation you want to bring about in yourself—a goal or intention. Or determine what quality, attitude, value, or characteristic you want to remind yourself of or develop in yourself.

Second, if it fits, add an emotion to the mix or a word that qualities the statement. For instance, I am joyfully at my ideal weight of 125. Or, I’m happily living in my own home. I personally like affirmations that strum my heartstrings: I offer gratitude for every step and every breath."

Third, make it positive vs. negative: “I am healthy and fit” rather than “I am no longer fat.”

"We become, have and attract what we think about and act upon correctly the most."

~John Assaraf

WHEN?
You don't have to say every affirmation every day. Punctuate your day with the affirmation as little as five times in eight hours. Create a "proper" action so that you are doing something associated with moving toward your desired state.

Hogan suggests, "Some say it takes 21 days of repetition for an affirmation make its mark on your psyche, so you can get great benefits by keeping just one of you affirmations going for at least a month. In the beginning you will have to consciously choose to repeat your affirmations. If you repeat them at every opportunity they will begin to replace the negative mind banter that takes over when we are not monitoring our thoughts."

HOW? A Rubric for Using Affirmations to Sustain a Positive Lifestyle
The sequence of development of sustainable positive thoughts, positive emotions, and positive behaviors (actions), follows a logical path beginning with mindfulness.

When acted upon properly, positive thoughts, emotions, and behaviors eventually become the natural way people live their lives; if not actually inborn, this way of life can be so internalized that it feels effortless and "natural." With proper repetition, thoughts and actions that at first had to be consciously brought to mind will become learned as habits.

Typically, the “proper” actions will result in sufficiently and frequently pleasant results (positive reinforcement) that they will be repeated. With enough repletion and reinforcement, they will become internalized (mapped in the brain). At that point, positive thoughts, emotions and behaviors have become so automatic that they “feel natural.”

I will map the progression using Good-Hearted Living™ as an example. It is a program of six practices that reduces stress, improves interpersonal relationships, and helps individuals enjoy life more, that specifically builds on this sequence.

Simply put, the six practices that comprise the low-demand Good-Hearted Living™ program have each practice linked to a different day of the week. This is merely to assist with remembering what they are. Any practice can be done on any day of the week. The six practices are: paying compliments (Monday), being flexible (Tuesday), gratitude (Wednesday), kindness (Thursday), forgiveness (Friday), and guilt-free leisure pleasures, i.e., informally called the chocolate or the “sweet things” in life (the weekend).

The sequence of development of a sustainable positive way of life, is:
Intention (Agreement to Focus) - you agree to give the program a try.

Mindfulness - you are reminded by reading a list (see Appendix for Good-Hearted Living™), or by memorizing or remembering which practice is the focus of a particular day of the week, e.g., “Fridays are for forgiveness.” Coupled with intention, this thought activates your RAS, a filter that will help bring opportunities for action on this thought into sharper focus throughout your day.

Action<->Result - the outcome of the proper action will almost always be pleasant or otherwise beneficial. This pleasant outcome will increase the likelihood that the behavior/action will be repeated. Example: In the supermarket, a fellow shopper aggressively jockeys ahead of you in the checkout line. Rather than stewing in your resentment and spending time plotting revenge, with your blood pressure boiling, you remember “forgiveness” and decide to let go of your anger. Immediately you feel (a) more calm, (b) your muscular tension turns t muscular relaxation, and, (c) you are pleased with yourself for remembering to do this positive practice. Later, you write about it in your journal.

Repetition - Sufficient repetition begins your brain mapping process (refer to the work of neuroscientist Antonio Damassio).

Habit - Brain mapping increases the tendency to have your affirmative positive thought linked to the tendency to follow through with an associated behavior, thus you form a habit.

Further Repetition - Sufficient repetition deepens the brain mapping process and extends the map to additional neural centers, thus strengthening the likelihood that you will be more alert to opportunities for positive thought, emotions, and actions.

“Natural” Way-of-Life - At some point, you will have a heightened perception of opportunities (triggers) for positive thinking, feeling, and acting that requires little or no conscious effort. That is when “positivity” has become a way of life and feels natural to you.

A SET OF AFFIRMATIONS TO CULTIVATE A MENTAL ATTITUDE THAT WILL BRING YOU PEACE, HEALTH, AND HAPPINESS

I (happily) fill my mind with thoughts of peace, courage, health and hope.

I (calmly) never try to get even with my enemies.

I expect imperfection; I adjust my expectations so that I more often predict reality more accurately.

I count my blessings not my troubles, and I fill my mind with thoughts of gratitude.

Rather than imitate others, I (respectfully) emulate qualities I admire in others, and create my own best self.

I profit from my losses; I celebrate rainbows.

I consider my impact on others so as to (uplift) contribute happiness for others.

I (joyfully) balance my perspective with laughter and humor.

Try these affirmations one at a time or in pairs that make sense to you, for a few weeks. I believe you will like the results.

(Some Material adapted from Affirmations: Why They Work & How to Use Them | by Eve Hogan | Spirituality & Health Voices Blog; http://www.spiritualityhealth.com/blog/affirmations-why-they-work/ 1/4/2012)

Game On! How to Create Positive Activity Interventions

Yo-Yo c. 600BC

Game On! is the name of the book I have written for "How to Create Positive Activity Interventions," which is the working title of a course I have designed to advance the development of therapeutic humor and laughter by a revolutionary leap. It will fortify and extend clinical practice and training with positive activity leadership skills.

We are now seeing more and clearer evidence for a major expanded role for humor, laughter, mirth, games, meditations, and other positive activities, in health, happiness, and improved human relationships.

Learning Positive Activity Intervention (PAI), professionals and lay persons will be able to incorporate elements of a variety of additional activities, beyond laughter exercises, that show great promise for ameliorating health challenges and paving the path to happiness.

Students of Game On! will be able to deliver programs that are stronger as therapeutic interventions, powerful boosts to achieving workplace objectives, strong supports for educational environments, and keys to enjoying life, i.e., happiness.

Game On! will save untold years off of the learning curve because I have been studying PAI in one form or another for more than 30 years. For Game On! I have distilled and synthesized the best thinking and practices so that they can be learned and put them into practice quickly. And, students will have an additional credential under the auspices of World Laughter Tour, to attest to their expertise.

From Harvard Business Review, January-February 2012, “Emerging research from neuroscience, psychology, and economics makes the link between a thriving workforce and better business performance absolutely clear.” In other words, there is undeniable scientific evidence that happy employees are more creative, more productive, healthier and more satisfied. Yet, for many people, the way to happiness, to more positive emotions, more positive thoughts, and more positive behaviors remains elusive.

Game On! will show the way.

Dreidel c.100BC

Speakers, trainers, teachers, medical, mental health and human services professionals and volunteers are about to make a quantum advance in audience participation and client self-administered programs that is memorable, meaningful, energizing, and fun.

Many of us have been intrigued with, studying and advocating the power of humor to heal, to improve the educational environment, to improve workplace environments, and to enjoy life more.

Those (6,000 or so) who have completed the basic course in “How to Create Therapeutic Laughter”,  have a basic understanding of leading groups in activity experiences; they know about the physiology, neurology, psychology, attitudinal influences, and social psychology of laughter, health and well-being; and they have some experience in planning and conducting related programs. They have a better than average understanding of the difference between humor and laughter.

Over the past 20-30 years, we have refined our knowledge and application of the field to differentiate laughter and mirth from humor, to develop specific activities around each which are thought to be therapeutic.

During that time, there has been a growing awareness and respect for other activities (interventions) such as therapeutic or caring clowns, non-competitive games, relaxation theory, and meditation practices.

The advent of the concept of Positive Activity Intervention, and the benefits suggested by research (Delivering Happiness, Layous et al, 2011), begs the question of a synthesis of theories and activities, and represent a significant next step in illuminating the human condition.

Board Game c. 1870

Putting together courses of study will fortify a variety of clinical and professional practices in this regard, as well as for volunteers and others who do have extensive professional training.

In the Western world, in what might be called modern times, starting in the mid-1960s, work on the concept mostly was centered on humor, with laughter taking a kind of back seat. This idea got a huge boost in 1979, when Norman Cousins published “Anatomy of an Illness.” Although Cousins was advocating humor as possibly the main source of his recovery from an illness, he became known as the man who laughed himself well. Indeed, most of the science of humor actually employs protocols based on the act of laughing.

Video Games c.1972

Various organizations that sprung up on the topic focused on humor, with humor and laughter treated pretty much as one thing: The Humor Project with its newsletter “Laughing Matters”; the International Society for Humor Studies, with the journal "Humor;" the European Summer Humor Institute; the American Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor, formed out of an organization called Nurses for Laughter (NFL); Patch Adams’ Gesundheit Institute, with the vision of a ‘happy hospital’; Wavy Gravy’s Camp Winnarainbow, blending humor, laughter, clowning, and performance art with peace and love; the International School of Laughter and Well-being in France
(formerly the French School of Laughter), with a 5-to-7 week training program.

Impressed and fascinated by Joel Goodman’s humor education courses, I joined this non-movement movement in 1984.

All along, there had been references to arcane Tibetan Buddhist laughter practices, but the mainstay, and the research, seemed to be about humor, comedy, jokes, finding humor, sensing humor, and developing one’s sense of humor.

Dr. William Fry, Jr., had long before (c.1964) suggested that humor (a psychological phenomenon), laughter (a physical act/reaction), and mirth (an emotional state) could and should be separated for certain purposes of research, practice, and understanding.

It was not until I returned from India (1998),  where I had been invited to lecture about positive work environments, which was a variation on the theme of “Putting Humor to Work at Work,” that I felt it was important, and possible, to distinguish laughter from humor as separate human capacities with therapeutic implications and applications.

In 1999, World Laughter Tour created a curriculum for laughter therapy based on the psychologic model familiar to the Western world in the form of Music Therapy, Art Therapy, and Activity Therapy, which required broadening the definition of “therapeutic” along the lines suggested and adopted by positive psychology.

Game On! gives access to a variety of approaches that will appeal to a broad spectrum of the population that seeks happiness or a boost in the management of a variety of ills from mood issues to the classroom environment, from supporting primary treatment for physical health to improving morale and productivity in the workplace.

Non-competitive Games c.1986

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What does a Rigologist look look like?

Bonjour, mes amis! C'est moi, le Rigologist!

With my teacher Corinne Cosseron

An old joke has a very nervous 13 year-old Bar Mitzvah boy thinking so much about the presents he is about to receive that instead of saying "Today I am a man," he distractedly starts his thank-you speech to the congregation with, "Today I am a fountain pen!"

Well, today, thanks to our good friends and colleagues Corinne and Fred Cosseron, I am Rigologist! I am not nervous, and I did receive two magnificent gifts: le beau chapeau rouge (beautiful red hat) you see in the photo above, and the masterful teachings of Corinne and Fred, who came from France to share wisdom, inspiration, and technique with me and eleven compatriots in Columbus, August 15-19, 2011.

From the website of the International School of Laughter (ISL): RIGOLOGY® and RIGOLOGIST® come from the French word “RIGOLO”, that means “funny” or “amusing” in child talk. « RIGOLOGY® » means  « the science of laughter and joie de vivre» « RIGOLOGIST® » is « the professional expert in laughter ».

A unique and very special workshop in Laughter is the Best Medicine
Pam and I organized the World Laughter Tour, Inc. (WLT) production of a 5-day course in Rigology. The curriculum highlighted the major topics covered in five weeks of education and training typically taught in France by Corinne and Fred Cosseron, founders of ISL, and their expert staff. It was conducted for the first time ever in the United States at Columbus, Ohio. Twelve professionals earned the title of Rigologist.

Working collaboratively brings the world closer together. Laughter is universal. Studying it together and having an open exchange of ideas connects us all with greater tolerance and better understanding of the human condition.

A baker's dozen of Rigologists at USA workshop

Rigology, Steve Wilson and Corrine Cosseron  
Independently, Corinne and I have ventured around the world exploring and synthesizing the techniques that stimulate joyful living.

I am impressed by the parallel developments in the ISL (France) and the WLT (USA) certification in therapeutic laughter. Our methods overlap in some areas, diverge in others, and are very complementary. It is surely a zeitgeist, a sign of the times and great minds thinking alike! Both methods teach techniques of laughter and joyful living to health care and social workers as well as people working in education and businesses, and also to the public at large.

The ISL course included highlights of Playful Sophrology®, a technique developed in Bogota, (Colombia) using Indian cooperative games, clowning techniques especially oriented toward hospital care, various humor exercises from different countries, games for all  ages, playful exercises associating dance, rhythms, sounds, singing, touch, massages, hugs, and more. Participants engaged in guided imagery to find their "inner smile", laughter meditation to clear the mind, and street clowning (not the circus type) to give away laughter and free hugs.

"From all corners of the world, unlimited imagination for celebrating provides a catharsis to help us digest events that are somewhat painful and which we all must sometime face," Corinne explains. "All People recognize the universal therapeutic power of laughter, smiling, and positive feelings in general."

Based on a synthesis of these findings, the course offered a toolbox combining many different techniques from all over the world. ISL co-founder Fred Cosseron said, "The goal is to offer to the grumpy westerners we have become, an array of efficient, quick, playful and funny tools intended to bring back laughter and joyful living  wherever it has disappeared − that is, everywhere!"

So, now there are 2 dozen "Rigologists"® in North America offering to all, and more specifically to health care professionals, social workers, and people working in education and businesses, the techniques for healthy and joyful living whose benefits are now scientifically proven. Plans are in the works to repeat the USA course in 2012.

For more information e-mail info@worldlaughtertour.com

A funny thing happened on the way to the Parthenon

By a show of hands, how many of you have had someone tell you a joke or send you one via e-mail that you've heard before, maybe heard it many times before? By a show of hands, how many of you actually heard the joke a really l-o-n-g time ago, say like in 2nd grade? One more time, by a show of hands, how many of you roll your eyes and have a clever retort to let the teller/sender know it was old, like, "thanks for the moldy oldie"?

Here are a few I have heard:
"That joke was so old, the first time I heard it I broke the slats on my crib laughing!"
"That joke was so old, the Big Bang woke it up!"
"That joke is so old the dinosaurs were telling it."
"That jokes is so old that Moses told it in the desert!"
"That joke is so old that Eve told it to Adam!"
"That joke is so old that the first time I heard it I fell off my dinosaur!"
OK, you get the idea. You can use the comment section of this blog to share your favorite moldy oldie-type of retort.

But did you know that many jokes being told today actually were told thousands of years ago? They just get updated with modern scenarios and up-to-date semantics & syntax. How do we know this? We know because we (well, archaeologists, anyway) have a copy of the first joke book: Bibliotheca scriptorum Graecorum et Romanorum Teubneriana*, more commonly known as Philogelos, a collection of 264 Greek jokes first complied in the fourth or fifth century BC, and considered to be the first known joke book.

Here are some of the jokes as translated by Professor William Berg**.

Any resemblance between these ancient jokes and anything you might have heard in your lifetime is purely, absolutely historically fascinating...and funny!

130. A Sidonian professor enters the public bath as soon as it opens. Finding no one else there, he comments to his slaves, 'It looks to me as if the bath isn't working.' 

141. Steering his ship, a quick-witted captain is asked, 'What kind of wind do we have today?' 'Beans and onions, I'd say,'  comes the response.

146. A sharper steals a pig and starts running with it When he's caught, he sets the pig on the ground and thrashes it, declaring, 'Do your digging here, not on my property!'

147. A quick study, coming upon a singer who's both shrill and off-key, greets him with the words, 'Hello there, Mr. Rooster!' 'Why do you call me that?,' asks the singer. 'Because whenever you crow, everybody gets up.'

148. When the garrulous barber asks him, 'How shall l cut  your hair?,' a quick wit answers, 'Silently.'

160. A Kymaean goes to see a friend of his. He's standing in front of the friend's house, calling his name, when another voice answers, "Shout louder, so he can hear!" So the Kymaean shouts, "Hey, Louder!"  

170. Someone asks a Kymaean where the attorney Dracontides lives. The guy responds, 'I'm all alone here,
but if you don't mind, watch my workshop and I'll go out and show you.'

228. A drunk is being railed at for losing touch with reality when he's had a snootful. Barely able to see straight because of the wine, the drunk retorts, 'Who's the drunk here, you or me - you two-headed freak!'

263. Someone tries to needle a quick-witted man by telling him, 'I had your wife for free.' But he just says, 'Me, I'm forced to put up with such an evil. What's forcing you?'

264. A sharp lawyer is pleading a case before a judge. When the judge nods off, the lawyer shouts, '1 appeal!' 'To whom?', asks the judge. 'To you, to wake up!'

265. A student dunce asks how many pints a 9-gallon amphora holds. 'Are we talking wine or water?' is the
answer he gets.    

It has been said that there are two sure rules for making something funny; unfortunately, nobody knows what they are! But, somebody must know something because here you can see the ancestral heritage of material you've heard and enjoyed from Hope, Youngman, Dangerfield, Leno, Benny, Berle, and many others who entertain us in modern times.

This jester tips his hat to the humorists, comics, and comedians who keep us laughing, whether the jokes are 3,000 years old or fresh and original, whether they are delivered by professionals, traveling salesmen, class clowns, or the person in the cubicle next to yours. Hooray, for funny people and for jokes!

Now, let's see, what would you imagine a 3,000 year-old joke might have sounded like?
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Euripides."
"Euripides who?
"Euripides pants, you in big trouble!"

Try your hand (or funny-bone) at coming up with our own, then share in the comment section.

* Ed. R. Dawe (c)K.G. Saur Verlag, an imprint of Walter de Gruyter GmbH & Co. KG Munchen 2001
**YUDU Media, London, UK